Ouch!
I wasn't quite ready to see this in my e-mail the other day:
Mom's birthday would have been Tuesday. It wasn't really a surprise, since it's still so recent, and we're all still in the midst of things, so to speak. When she passed, I knew that it was only a few weeks from her birthday, so it feels like one more detail that we need to take care of as we finalize a person's affairs, rather than the "slap in the face" it would have felt like if she had passed six months ago and I was suddenly reminded just now.
Also, our birthdays were pretty close together (mine's nine days later), so often I felt the two sort of blended together. Summer's been such a busy time for me over the last 10 years that birthdays often became a secondary consideration. That's not to say that I forgot them--we always called each other and sent cards (usually e-mail cards!), and I usually came down to visit on a weekend that was between the two dates. But it wasn't like the birthdays were the only things going on in our lives.
Still, it was kind of weird opening an e-mail that reminded me of something that I've grown to take for granted over the years: "Your mother's birthday is coming up--better buy a present!" And suddenly realizing there's no present to buy this year.
But this is all part of the transition, which I will eventually get used to...
*************************
On a happier note, this weekend is Milwaukee Pridefest, and The Joans are playing tomorrow at 4:00PM on the Miller Lite Main Stage. If you're in the area, and feel like a fun live show, come check us out! Here are the details again:
DATE: June 7, 2008
TIME: 4:00PM
Henry W. Maier Festival Park
200 N. Harbor Drive
Milwaukee, WI
Mom's birthday would have been Tuesday. It wasn't really a surprise, since it's still so recent, and we're all still in the midst of things, so to speak. When she passed, I knew that it was only a few weeks from her birthday, so it feels like one more detail that we need to take care of as we finalize a person's affairs, rather than the "slap in the face" it would have felt like if she had passed six months ago and I was suddenly reminded just now.
Also, our birthdays were pretty close together (mine's nine days later), so often I felt the two sort of blended together. Summer's been such a busy time for me over the last 10 years that birthdays often became a secondary consideration. That's not to say that I forgot them--we always called each other and sent cards (usually e-mail cards!), and I usually came down to visit on a weekend that was between the two dates. But it wasn't like the birthdays were the only things going on in our lives.
Still, it was kind of weird opening an e-mail that reminded me of something that I've grown to take for granted over the years: "Your mother's birthday is coming up--better buy a present!" And suddenly realizing there's no present to buy this year.
But this is all part of the transition, which I will eventually get used to...
*************************
On a happier note, this weekend is Milwaukee Pridefest, and The Joans are playing tomorrow at 4:00PM on the Miller Lite Main Stage. If you're in the area, and feel like a fun live show, come check us out! Here are the details again:
DATE: June 7, 2008
TIME: 4:00PM
Henry W. Maier Festival Park
200 N. Harbor Drive
Milwaukee, WI
posted by Aaron at 10:52 AM
6 Comments:
Jo Lynn celebrated her birthday in a far better place this year.
In Jesus day people heard him say Abraham rejoiced to see my day. The people were puzzled. They said to Jesus, "Abraham has been dead for 500 years and your not yet 50 years old are you saying you've seen father Abraham?" Jesus said, "all live unto Christ, God is not the God of the dead; When God said he is the God of Isaac and Jacob and Abraham He is the God of the living."
Maybe you can't grasp the God thing but Einstein said energy cannot be created or destroyed. We are beings made of energy therefore we must live forever in some form. Jo lynn will smile down on you on your birthday of that I'm sure. Ed
Thanks Ed...I know she's looking down on me now. It's strange, but I've been trying to connect with her presence over the last few days, and haven't felt it. I think it's just too soon. And I've been insanely busy and stressed with work.
If she IS looking down, that should give me some incentive to clean my apartment--it's getting pretty squalid. But I don't feel like it...LOL
This was a very moving blog entry Aaron. When did your mother pass away? I'm so sorry. That has to be tough. I have found that the power of prayer to God for strength, guidance and direction has helped me through tough times in life, so I'll say a prayer for you too - that God will give you the strength, wisdom, and guidance to help you through. I'm here anytime you want to talk about anything that's on your mind. I'll try to listen and help as much as possible. Hugs friend. - Suni
Hi Suni! Thanks for dropping by...my mom passed away May 18. She'd been terminally ill for about nine months, so we were just grateful that she didn't suffer any more than she did. (She was out of her mind at the end, so it was probably a blessing, though it was very hard to watch her not remember anything or make sense--my heart goes out to people who have loved ones with Alzheimers. I can only imagine what it must be like for them...
Thanks for your prayers--they are very much appreciated.
I've come across those reminders one too many times in those same situations. It's hard to say, "finalize." Just like your birthday and your mother's, my birthday is 4 days apart from my father's and it never fails that one of our birthdays always falls on Father's Day. We debated whether to go to PrideFest or not based on the terrible weather. One year I had the opportunity to meet Mark Weigle, a gay vocalist.
Steven: Well,we got through the day and now, at least, there's one milestone we've made it through. The holidays will be the next (and probably a lot harder). And yes, "finalizing" is difficult, but we're determined to get those things done. We don't want them hanging over our heads anymore (especially that credit card bill)...
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