Thursday, February 15, 2007

Sometimes, the "But At Least I Was Honest" Defense Doesn't Work...

Ex-NBA star Tim Hardaway hates gay people. But, like Isaiah Washington, he's sorry he said it. Translation: "At least I was honest about what I thought. Ain't that supposed to be all 'refreshing' and shit? Ain't people supposed to be taken aback and look at me in a new respectful light for daring to me be? No? Man, I hate this 'caring about what other people think' stuff."

Welcome to our world, asshole.

The real question is: are any of us surprised to hear this kind of talk coming from athletes? I don't mean the Olympics, I mean sports: you know, that thing that appeals to all the beer-guzzling armchair louts around the world. What else can you expect? He said in his original diatribe that it would be uncomfortable having a gay teammate in the locker room with the other players. He forgets that the fellow player is probably just as buff as the rest of them (if not more so, because we gay people never do anything halfway or just to impress chicks), just as disciplined about his sports, and isn't likely to lose control of himself over a bunch of guys who smell like a cross between Absorbine Jr. and the devil's asshole.

What are you more threatened by: the idea that he would make a pass at you, or that he wouldn't? To put it another way, is the management worried about you boning cheerleaders right out there on the field? No? Then don't get your jockstraps in a twist over this, stud. And when I say "stud," I mean "thick wooden plank," because that's about how smart you are.

The NBA was quick to remove Hardon--er, Hardaway from further public appearances, saying that "he doesn't represent their point of view." Translation: "He says out loud what we all think privately, but can't express because all these 'mos will boycott our sponsors, and they know it." Since most of us don't really give a shit about sports (except during SuperBowl time, when it's shoved down our throats--insert stale penis joke here), I don't expect much reaction from the gay community.

It's sports, after all. These folks all exist to pick the nits off each other, like gorillas. But I hope they don't like it too much...otherwise, people might think they're, like, all gay or something...

2 Comments:

Anonymous Ed said...

Both Washington and Hardaway are black. You think they would know and care about discrimination and using words like the N word and the Q word.
Guess what Hardaway we don't care much for you right now either. Washington is still telling everybody he meets, "I'm sorry I called T.R. a queer." We are sorry you are part of the human race. So we are even.

9:34 PM  
Blogger Aaron said...

I'm not even so sure either of them is part of the human race...!

11:01 PM  

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