Awwww...He Tho Thowwy!
(Photo courtesy of Borden Dairy Products--er, I mean CBS Radio. I think.)
Don Imus is sorry for his remarks about the Rutgers women's basketball team. (Those would be the remarks he made late last week, in which he referred to them as "nappy headed ho's.")
What a shitstorm he hath wrought upon himself! Al Sharpton says he should be fired. A whole bunch of other people say he ought to be fired.
The end result: he will not be fired. Of course he won't. History shows us that notoriety just brings in audience and profits. There is no moral threshold in the media anymore, no line that will not be crossed under the auspices of "provoking controversy and, thus, discussion" (yeah, that's it). Isaiah Washington is still stinking up "Grey's Anatomy" after pulling a similar stunt (twice).
CBS Radio called Imus's remarks "inappropriate," NBC called them "deplorable," and he said this morning in an on-air apology that what people need to realize is that "I'm a good person...who happened to say a bad thing."
Oh, I see--you just happened to say it? That means you weren't in charge of your own words! You were a victim of sinister mind control! You poor frizzy-headed-looking-more-like-Phil-Spector-every-day pile of unwashed clothes! Who did this to you? Zardoz? Rupert Murdoch? Don't you worry! We'll get 'em for throwing you into this! We'll get 'em good!
Don't try to kid us, I-man. You're an opportunist who says these things all the time in order to create controversy. Fair enough. That's your job, and you do it well. But don't pretend that you were a poor little lamb lost in the woods who just happened to set one wooly foot astray onto the path of political incorrectness. You're a little long in the tooth to play that ingenue.
And really, spare us the false sincerity of your apologies. A person who just "happens" to say a bad thing will regret it immediately and not repeat it over and over for shock value, as you no doubt will. You will not "learn" from this because it was not an accident. It was very carefully calculated and deliberate.
And certainly more sincere than the apology.