Tuesday, March 18, 2008

When a 20 On the Nightstand Just Isn't Enough...

Warning: You all (all three of you!) might think I'm a meanie-weenie-from-Cabrini after you read this, but I thought it was more creative than "I told you so," which was my goal. So here goes...

Heather Mills wanted $250 million from Paul McCartney. But listen to what the man said: judge Hugh Bennett told her that’s "exorbitant" (his wording) and is giving her under $50 million instead, including $15 million of Heather’s own assets.

That poor, poor thing...how WILL she survive?? It must be a huge blow to her, especially since she only married him for the money, anyway. And $48.6 million doesn’t go as far as it used to--especially when the Taxman comes!

(OK, OK I’ll stop now...)

She also dumped a glass of water over McCartney’s lawyer’s head, saying she’d been "baptized in court." Maybe I’m amazed...that she wasn’t held in contempt! (All right, NOW I’ll stop.)

The judge ruled that McCartney has to pay $70,000 per year for the couple’s daughter, Beatrice. Plus all her school and nanny fees. That sounds pretty generous to me--how much money does a 4-year-old need?! My parents made do with a fraction of that when I was that age. Combined. And they both worked.

But the barnacles who cling to the rich and famous clearly have a larger budget in mind than we mere plebians could possibly understand, and Armani strollers aren’t cheap. So Heather’s pissed at the $70K ruling. "Obviously, his daughter is meant to travel B-class while her father travels A-class," she snorted.

Shut up, bitch. Go buy a nice house in the country and get lost in it. And how about a nice, long hike up some hills while you’re at it?

There. NOW you can call me a meanie-weenie...


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hell, they weren't really married that long. I heard that the amount she got came out to 1400 dollars an hour for every hour they were married. Good pay if you can get it. The crazy thing is that Paul offered her 50 million a year ago and she said it wasn't enough.
It reminds me of the lady lounging by her olympic size pool a few years ago on 60 minutes. One could see a mansion in the background. She was sueing her ex for back support. The reporter inquired about her present status, "Oh I'm married to a millioniare now but that's beside the point, my ex can keep driving his truck until he is 80 and pay me what he owes me". The look on the reporters face was... priceless! Ed

12:33 PM  
Blogger Aaron said...

There's nothing worse than mercenary spite...and some people come into relationships with dollar signs in their eyes, and nothing else. That's why, in a weird way, I'm grateful I don't have all that much. I don't have to worry as much about people's motivation for their interest in me (not that I'm often bothered anyway).

12:56 PM  
Blogger BC said...

She is a big pile of gross

11:21 PM  
Blogger Aaron said...

And she looks like Ann Coulter, too. I wasn't going to mention it before (because I hadn't noticed until I saw the pictures of her yesterday), but she does.

9:39 AM  
Blogger Gregory said...

I have so little patience with that kind of selfishnes.

I'm sure she's losing sleep over my inability to cope with her grossness.

1:40 PM  
Blogger Aaron said...

She's probably losing more sleep over the fact that, in order to maintain the lifestyle she would have liked to get used to, she may someday have to return to work. In an industry that doesn't really have a lot of use for her anymore (modeling + babies = unemployment. I don't agree with that myself, but the fashion industry is full of anemic vampires who like everyone else to share that flaw).

4:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Old rich guys who marry young pretty women get what they deserve. I often hear "oh, she married him for his MONEY" but you rarely hear "oh, he married her for her sweet young ass." Seems they both got what they wanted/deserved.
Gary Airedale

11:33 PM  
Blogger Aaron said...

Actually, Gary, she DIDN'T get what she wanted...at least not all of it! :-)

9:12 AM  

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